A mother comforting her child is the picture God has used to tell us that he cares.
A mother’s comfort is not just about calming our troubled minds. That is just a starting point. More of it is about her presence nearby which gives us a sense of belonging, an assurance of security, and a knowledge that someone understands what one is passing through.
Yes, this is the triumph of the motherlike love of God. He holds us near in his loving embrace. In your troubles he knows that you are helpless. Like a hen gathering her chicks under her wings, you too will find a place of safety and refuge there.
Come and experience the motherlike love of God today. Is your heart broken and you feel like giving up? Do not miss this comforting love of God.
He is watching over you. When everyone says ill of you and there is none who comes to help and all your hopes are dashed; there is God who will comfort you like a mother comforting her child.
When you experience it, you’ll know that God has not given upon you; that you are his child, and that he loves you.
He looks forward to that day when he will wipe away every tear from your eyes. But till then, he comes near to you as your Comforter in your perplexing moments and comforts you.
So dear brother/sister; just open up your heart to the comforting love of God. Do not doubt the reality of this comfort.
Blessed are you if open up to experience this comforting love of God. Yes, like a mother comforting her child God will take care of you; support you; hold your hand and carry you through as if carried on the strength of eagles’ wings!
—
Title inspired by Isaiah 66:13 Bible.
Short Speeches of Introduction, Welcome, Felicitation, Vote of Thanks!
Standing still is difficult. It does not come naturally to any one of us. Like a child who has just learned to walk; our hearts and hands constantly try to grab things fast.
With mobiles in our hands that can compute real fast if some page takes more than a few seconds to load we become impatient.
In the midst of such daily experiences, God commands us to stand still. But those who have tried to do so know that it is more than difficult. We would like to engineer our ideas and try to help God somehow.
Yes, standing still goes against our wisdom. We are used to connect with people, use money power, or influence to get things done. Waiting for God to act is not in our scheme of things.
But God waits. He waits to allow us to come to the end of our strivings. He waits till our strength and resources and wisdom are all exhausted. He waits until we are truly helpless.
Unable to fight one more round when we lie down in the dust; God steps in. He acts decisively.
So today make a deliberate attempt to calm your hearts and minds before God.
He is on his throne and in absolute control of all that is happening in your life. He is concerned for you. Negative circumstances and giant opposition is no match for his wisdom and power.
The only thing he is asking of you and me is to put our confidence and trust in him. Standing still is an outward sign of our faith in God. In such moments our focus is on God himself, how big he is, how great he is, how wise he is, and how great power and resources he commands.
So my dear friend, tell God that you have come to the end of all your ideas. Ask him to step in and tell him you feel helpless. Remember that the battle is God’s. You role is to stand still and watch what God is going to do for you.
When you stand still without running here and there in desperation, there will come people asking you, “On what are you basing this confidence of yours?” Do not let their doubts or their ridicule shake your faith. Stand still. Stand firm and see the deliverance God will bring in your life.
“Man’s extremity is God’s opportunity<” so said John Flavel . Sometimes God acts only when there seems to be no hope to go forward and no possibility of going back. It is then that you have to stand still and not give in to panic.
Short Speeches of Introduction, Welcome, Felicitation, Vote of Thanks!
It’s never too late to start. You should turn your back to the past and walk forward in hope. If it is strength for the journey you are worried about; it is God himself who will be your strength.
It’s never too late to start. None of us are assured of tomorrow. So do not be anxious about what might happen. That is none of your business. But think about how you can make the present opportunity better.
It’s never too late to start. You might have debated long in your mind how to say that you are sorry for the wrong words you used or the mistakes you made. Most of us have passed through it. But if you are genuinely sorry, say it now. It will start to heal a lot of wounds.
It’s never too late to start. So many good things you planned to do, die before they are even born; isn’t it? A perfect start is often a myth; but a small beginning has in it potential to grow and multiply. What matters is not the feebleness of the attempt but that you get things start moving.
It’s never too late to start. Most of us neglect our loved ones at home in the pursuit of our career, hobbies, or even earning more likes and views in social media. But isn’t that sad? Remember what the great cricketer and missionary C. T. Studd said, “The light that shines farthest shines brightest nearest home.” So start to spend more time with your loved ones and make a deliberate effort to show them your love today.
It’s never too late to start. Say No. Most of your troubles can be due to your attempt to please people. Starting today, say no when you are in doubt, when you clearly know that something is wrong, and when you understand that others are trying to manipulate you.
It’s never too late to start to seek God. Just take a moment to say, “I love you, O God.” “Have mercy on me, O God.” “Help me, O my God.” “Guide me, O Lord.” “Give me wisdom to take the right decision.” Or, “Thank you Lord.” In these short and simple prayers, your life can open up to possibilities of God stepping into your life. Seek God today; look into his glorious face, and see the compassion for you in his eyes.
Get up!
Life is more about second chances than you can dream of. Champions and winners script success stories by rising up from the ashes of defeat. They are heartbroken when they see someone else lift the trophy for which they fought with sportsman spirit till the last moment. But that does not prevent them from pursuing their goal to win. You too should be like that. Don’t stay in your bed of despair. This is the time to get up!
Get up!
It might have been years that you stayed in this defeated mode. That doesn’t matter. God is not only the God of your past but of your present and your future as well. He is not limited by all that went wrong in your life. He is not limited by the victim stories you have told yourself and others countless number of times. He is not limited by all your negative circumstances, all those people who tell you that you can’t succeed, or any other force that is bulldozing you at this time. He wants to act decisively in your life. Therefore, get up!
Get up!
This one single act can change the way you think, act, and move forward. It is by taking this first step that you will realize all that the locusts have eaten away in your life. It is this one act of getting up that can change your destiny. Do not wait. Now is the time. This moment is your opportunity. Get up!
“Why are you downcast,
O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Saviour and my God”
It is an Organization’s unique approach to work that helps shape its culture. Building a world class culture in an Organization is like growing a tree. It will take time to send its roots deep. But once it takes hold it is firm.
Here are the seven must-haves that builds a great culture in any Organization:
Discipline
A positive and vibrant culture happens only with discipline. This discipline is not imposed by rules and regulations, do’s and don’ts. This discipline is self-imposed and not enforced by force and supervision. Instead it is delivered by people who have a passion about their work and a commitment to see their work contribute to the greatness of the brand for which they work for.
Leadership
Culture does not work upwards from the rank and file of an Organization. Instead it is largely determined by the leadership. It begins with a leader’s vision and values. It gathers momentum by the enthusiasm shown by the leader in creating an ambience within the Organization that is in tune with his stated purpose of the Organization’s long-term goals, strategies, career paths for employees and of course people policies. When members of the team align themselves to this; there is rapid growth and progress.
Pride and Meaning
To have a great culture, people in an Organization need to feel meaning in their work. Most of them do not care about the big picture. But they do need to be assured that their role and the work they do makes a significant contribution to the Organization. Only then will they have pride in the Organization they work for. The bottom line is that motivation to embrace culture does not depend entirely on the money one earns; but it depends more on knowing that one’s work is valued.
Freedom, Autonomy, and Responsibility
We all love freedom. And what most people hate is working for bosses who are generally not positively spoken of. An Organization which can give freedom to its employees to work can create a culture which is totally different from an Organization which functions under autocratic hierarchical structures.
Freedom does not mean that employees work randomly and totally at their will and pleasure even if it is work from home. No.
There are expected deliverables against deadlines even when work is done as self-managed teams. Leadership roles change within teams as and when required. The sense of ownership and the way members of team take up responsibility is immense when working like this.
Communication
How do you feel when the Organization keeps you knowledgeable about its progress? How do you feel when they call you for an All-Hands meet and share with you the joy of having accomplished one of your big goals? How do you feel when they inform you truthfully about reversals of fortunes and honestly tell you about some cost-cutting measures that has to be taken? The impact of communication which is clear, direct and purposeful is enormous as far as culture is concerned.
Ideas that boost brand image has to be repeatedly communicated to all within the Organization in creative ways. It will infuse members of the team with confidence and pride.
The “We” feel
Celebrations and coming together are not a waste of money. Instead it creates culture. It creates an immense and invaluable memory bank of good times together. What bonds families is the time they spent together. In the same way, Organizations which create avenues for meaningful get-together is building a rock-solid foundation for retaining their best work force in the best of good will and loyalty.
Purpose
If you want me to single out one word or concept which contributes to great culture, I can answer in one word. That is purpose. It is an understanding of purpose that gives an Organization the reason for its existence. It is an earnest belief in purpose that helps an Organization endure difficult times and come through crises stronger and vibrant than ever before.
It is purpose that determines what business to do and what not to pursue. It is purpose that enables employees to avoid distractions and focus on what is meaningful and absolutely essential. In fact, Organizations thrive when purpose permeates their thinking, attitudes, communication, habits and action.
Short Speeches of Introduction, Welcome, Felicitation, Vote of Thanks!
Featured image: Bejoy Peter, Performance Coach, seen in the backdrop of purpose statement of Mettle Networks, Technopark, Thiruvananthapuram, May 2018.
One of the questions commonly asked in my training sessions is this: “What will others think about me?” Whether it be professionals or students they share this same concern.
Often I’ve seen many talented speakers in my training sessions make wrong judgements of their own speech. They sport a sad face after they speak. If asked why they look so defeated, the reply usually is, “I did not do well.”
This reaction is usually triggered by a few inattentive participants in the group. The speaker therefore concludes that his or her speech was not worth listening to. The truth is that you cannot judge the quality of your speech by audience reaction alone.
Look at these three incidents and come to your own conclusion regarding, “What will others think about me?”
The first one happened at a recording in All India Radio, Thiruvananthapuram studio. I had sent one of my students to do the recording of a story for Yuvavani a youth programme. She was reading her script in the recording room. From there she could see the computer room through a glass partition.
A few people who were involved in the recording process were talking with each other and laughing in that room. Their jovial chatter posed no threat to my student who was reading her script well because it was a sound-proof room. Yet at one point in time the graph on the computer screen stopped showing the voice-recording. My student had stopped reading!
Surprised by this (because my student was reading well), one of the programme executives came over to her side from the other room. She was asked why she had stopped reading. The reply took the programme executive by surprise.
My student told the programme executive that she had suddenly panicked thinking that all of the programme executives were laughing and joking at her poor reading. How far from the truth it was! The programme executives were sharing some funny stories. It had nothing to do with my student reading her script (this was her first recording experience too).
The second incident happened many years ago at the College Annual Day. It was March 17, 1995. I had the privilege of doing the Reply to the Toast Speech. It was a speech that I had dreamed of doing the last year of my college and I had prepared well to the best of my ability.
After having studied in Mar Ivanios College, University of Kerala, for seven years, I knew a large majority of students seated in the auditorium personally. Yet a couple of minutes after I started to speak there were howls and boos from the jam-packed audience. It took me by surprise because I was delivering a very carefully prepared speech.
I was shaken a little bit because that was the first time I faced such a reaction from the crowd in the college auditorium. That being my last speech (a swan song, so to say) at the auditorium as a student of the college, I felt sad too. But somehow I kept my composure and finished the speech.
After the programme was over, my teachers congratulated me for the wonderful speech I had delivered. Now it really baffled me why then had the crowd created trouble for me while I spoke?
As I thought on this contradiction, the truth dawned on me. There were several speeches that had preceded my speech. The student community were gathered together that day not to listen to speeches but to listen to the songs and enjoy the dance programmes that would follow in the variety entertainment segment.
The students had howled to send across the message that they wanted the cultural programmes to begin quickly. Their howls had nothing to do with the quality of my speech.
So let me come back to that original question, “What will others think about me?” The truth is that they might not be thinking anything negative about you at all. Their reactions might have to do with something else. While you speak, do not try too much to read negative meanings into reactions in the audience.
Let me now move on to the third incident. At National Institute of Personnel Management (Trivandrum Chapter), I asked all my students to read aloud what I had written on the board. After all the twenty-three students had read those lines, I asked one student to stand up and read those lines again. Her reaction took me by surprise.
Almost in tears, she asked me, “Why Sir, why do you want me to read again?” She thought that I had found fault with her reading. The truth was, her reading was so excellent that I wanted the other students to listen to her once again! How wrong an interpretation and negative colouring she had given to the request!
Isn’t it true that we often jump into wrong conclusions from how others react? Therefore, kindly stop thinking too much about what others think about you.
How can you tackle self-doubt? Let us look at seven steps to do so:
Look at the worst that can happen. You might fail. So what? At least your fear of failure will be removed; isn’t it?
Look at your best performance in the past. If you could do it then, you can certainly repeat that again; can’t you?
Look at all those who are eagerly waiting for you to do your part. Maybe it is your speech, your song, or your batting. Whatever it be they are all looking forward to your success. Isn’t that encouraging?
Look at those closest to you: Your parents, brothers and sisters, teachers, friends, Coach etc. They are people who believe the best about you. They know you can.
Look at the opposition. If they are strong it should bring out the fighting spirit in you. Therefore do not yield to a spirit of despair. You can conquer your doubts and win.
Look to yourself. You are unique; isn’t it? Doubts are not a sign of lack of talent but it is usually nervousness playing its trick before a critical performance. So learn to master it. Self-doubt comes to those who are genuinely talented.
Finally look to God. He is a great encourager. He says “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you. I know you by name. You are mine. I have given you both skill and wisdom to perform the tasks I have called you to do. And I will never leave you nor forsake you. Therefore, be strong and courageous!”
“Do not fear, for I am with you;
Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you, surely I will help you,
Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.”
God-given dreams take you through opposition, hatred, and standstills. Circumstances will seem to kill your dreams. But God-given dreams cannot die.
God-given dreams will often bring unlikely people acting a part in its fulfillment. They might act against you, might forget you, might say false stories about you, and even try to shut you in somewhere. But in all these events, God who put the dream in your heart is watching over you.
God-given dreams have an appointed time when all that you thought were lost hopes will suddenly come to life, gather momentum, and roll forward at dizzying speeds. Then all watching will know it is the hand of God that has done it and he has acted on your behalf.
God-given dreams bring great power and authority over people and situations. If you remain humble and do not forget the hardships God took you through to make you reach there, and if you have a forgiving spirit towards those who tried to do you harm; then God will prosper you and make all that you put your hands to, to succeed.
God-given dreams need wisdom from God to act with foresight in trying situations. Such dreams demand that you guard your character and keep it without spot. When all these combine with care and compassion for people, royal doors will open for you.
Finally, God-given dreams are given to those who are tested and tried in the furnace of afflictions that their hearts might be prepared to handle fame, fortune, authority, and power that will be given them. In their hands God-given dreams will find its intended fulfillment and success!
Great achievements follow when your pursuits are fuelled by the I Can belief and attitude. When this combines with enthusiasm and perseverance you become unstoppable.
Don’t Give Up
Life often brings unexpected difficulties. Some of them may cause you to feel like a failure. But you should fight back from defeats. Don’t quit when one more attempt might possibly change your fortunes.
Now Is Your Opportunity
You might love to run away from an opportunity because you are not well prepared. It doesn’t matter if you fail; go grab the opportunity and perform now. Waiting for a perfect moment, which never comes, is a deception.
Don’t Fear
There are moments fear grips each one of us. It is easy to yield to it. One way to get out of it is to encourage yourself with the reality of God’s presence with you. There is no greater antidote to fear than that.
You Are Valued
Are you someone who is constantly being compared with your brother or sister or friend or neighbour or colleague? It is a sad situation when you are unable to feel your worth. But remember you are unique. God created no one else on earth like you. He values you and rewards you not by comparing yourself with anyone else but by asking, “Did you faithfully use the talent or potential I gifted you with?”
The truth will set you free if you stop looking at your past and lost opportunities to the new thing that God is willing to do in your life.
The truth will set you free if you stop thinking that you are good enough and instead come to God realising that like everyone else you too are a sinner in need of God’s mercy.
The truth will set you free if you are ready to give up the spirit of despair you entertain in your mind and exchange it for a clothing of praise and joy that God wants to gift you with.
The truth will set you free if you are willing to believe that God invests in people who count themselves failures and will build a future for you even when others have rejected you.
The truth will set you free if you can remember that at no point in life are you outside God’s love, outside God’s reach, and outside God’s care and compassion and mighty power to help.
The truth will set you free if the only thing you have to offer God is a broken heart; the only prayer you can bring him is “Have mercy on me,” and the only promise you can make is “I love you, O God.”
The truth will set you free if you can look at the cross and see the forgiving love of God and trust that he hung there bleeding in your place and there is nothing that will separate you from his love; ever!
Cricket World Cup 2011 will showcase some of the great talents of cricket. Not only is it going to be great entertainment it will also witness joy and agony, elation and tears, at the drama of quickly changing fortunes. It is not only about dreams come true but also about rains that steal victory from the deserving. Cricket World Cup, again, is not only about yelling crowds and great expectations; but it also about great wins, closely-fought contests, and unexpected defeats as well. In that sense, the game of cricket is close to life. It is this exciting aspect of how cricket is closely knit to the game of life that I would love to explore in today’s talk, Life Lessons from Cricket.
Cricket is a beautiful game. It not only entertains but educates as well. To a keen observer of the game, cricket teaches motivational secrets that can bring success in life. The basic lesson is that life is a game. It has laws and boundaries. We have to abide by the laws and play according to it. Yet winning remains a great art. Not all players win all the time. But then winning alone is not what matters most; but how one plays the game.
Therefore the question is with what attitude do you approach life? Is it with a negative approach which despairs even before the first ball is bowled? Again, do you approach life with a pessimistic attitude saying that the opposition is strong and their total is big and I will not be able to get there? Or do you believe in your God-given abilities, and try to give it your best shot with a positive never-say-die attitude? Remember, it is the same ball that can take your wicket or that can be hit for a six. Remember that life is short and what is important is to play the game with hope. As King Solomon rightly pointed out; “Anyone who is among the living has hope-even a live dog is better off than a dead lion!”
With that in mind let us look at some life lessons from the game of cricket.
First of all, cricket teaches us that mistakes are common in life. I have often wondered the reason why bowlers are motivated to keep on bowling even when the batsmen are hitting them for boundaries and sixes? The simple reason is that they bowl in the hope that the batsmen will soon commit a mistake. We as viewers of the game are either delighted with the opposition’s mistakes or made sad by our team’s mistakes.
But the game goes on. That is perhaps the highlight. We have seen great batsmen get out for a duck or get run-out. We also have seen great bowlers being hit for many boundaries in an over. All this is part of the game. So let us face the fact that mistakes are common in life. The key to success is not to lose heart when a mistake happens. Instead learn from it; make your skills sharper and try again with renewed spirit the next time. And always be alert to the possibility of mistakes.
Secondly, cricket teaches us that each individual is unique and important even in a team. One big difference between cricket and football and many other team games as well is that in cricket there is greater scope for individual brilliance. In the past there were all-rounders or match-winners who could change the game in their team’s favour very quickly. Kapil Dev, Imran Khan, Richard Hadlee, Ian Botham, were all consistent players who could change a game with bat or ball. And there were players who epitomized the joy of fielding like Jonty Rhodes who could turn the tide by his brilliant fielding alone. In modern cricket, such players are called game-changers.
What makes a player a game-changer? A player who knows his role well; one who knows what is expected of him at any given moment in the game and does exceeding well in bringing his role to perfection is one who is a game-changer. Sachin Tendulkar, who has won the most number of Man of the Match awards in One day Internationals is a classic example. What is the lesson for you? Many young people think that they are not good enough. This is a mistaken thought. You are created unique. Celebrate your uniqueness and find out your role in life and then be the best in that role. Success will then coming knocking at your doorsteps.
Thirdly, cricket teaches us that success comes to those who enjoy the game. If you take a good look at the great names of world cricket, you’ll find that those names that are not forgotten by generations are those of cricketers who played with passion on their sleeves. To them, cricket was not a means of livelihood or brand promotion. Instead they loved the game, dedicated themselves to be masters of it and did hard work to bring their skills to perfection.
They took to the field with sincerity of purpose, were focussed and sweated it out. But above all, they delighted in the opportunity to play for their national team. They took pride in it. Such players have left behind a lasting legacy. The secret is to enjoy playing the game. Likewise in life too we need to learn to enjoy the work we do. Then success will come naturally. To quote the wise King Solomon once again: “Do you see a man skilled in his work? He will serve before kings; he will not serve before obscure men.” Let us also remember the words of Sachin Tendulkar: “Statistics could be a form of reflection of what a player has contributed but for me it is about enjoyment and not statistics”
A few more points related to Life Lessons from Cricket needed to be noted as well. Cricket teaches us that life needs planning. The way a batsman paces an innings well is a sign of his class as well as the fact that he calculates his moment of acceleration with precision. In test cricket a batsman gets ample time to get used to the wicket and the bowling and then start scoring at leisure. But in the limited overs game things are a bit different. Here the batsman’s ability to adapt quickly to the given situation is what makes him a valued player. From the bowler’s point of view, test cricket is a test of one’s endurance while the limited overs game is a question about how quickly he can get wickets or contain the batsman.
All this requires great planning and preparation which includes studying the opposition. Each individual player’s strengths and weakness has to be analysed to have a great game plan. Likewise in life too there should be real planning. Nothing should be left to chance. To quote King Solomon again, “Go to the ant, you sluggard; consider its ways and be wise! It has no commander, no overseer or ruler, yet it stores its provisions in summer and gathers its food at harvest.” So plan well. Have confidence in your gifts and talents. Play each ball with the merit it deserves. Treat your opposition with respect. Play according to your game plan and be sure to have a back-up plan if your original planning fails.
The next thought is that cricket teaches us that success in cricket as well as in life is a matter of perseverance. All great players have had their moments of failure. Usually with bad performances in consecutive matches, the media goes to attack the player even if his past records speak for itself. This is especially true with the Indian Media and the pressure of critics is very difficult to handle. Sometimes former players pitch in with harsh and unjust criticism. But great batsmen let their bats do the talking taking failures in their stride. Likewise, great bowlers come back with crucial wicket-taking performances.
Note that all such great players have something in common. They’re winners and they have the passion to win. They never quit. Criticism only fuels their resolve to do their best. We need to remember this quote now long associated with cricket: “Form is temporary; class is permanent.” The life lesson is that you need to weather stormy seasons and endure lean patches in life. You need to always hold on and never quit.
Remember the words of Sir Winston Churchill who said, “Never! Never! Never! Never! give up.” Do not consider a game over till the last ball is bowled for as Napolean Bonaparte said, “Victory belongs to the most persevering.” Do not blame circumstances; one has to learn be a good player in fast wickets and slow-turning pitches at home as well as abroad. Learn to play the game of life with great sportsmanship.
Above all else, cricket teaches us that life is about entertainment. The goal of each player is to do well so as to entertain the audience. How is this done? Through a variety of ways. There is nothing more fascinating to watch than a pace bowler bowling great line and length and have the batsman in a mesmerized hold. There is a kind of rhyme and rhythm to the long run up to the crease and completed by a graceful follow through.
A spinner on the other hand often tricks a batsman by his flight and varied pace and turn. Or is there anything more lovely than an exciting cover drive, or a straight drive which gives no chance to any fielder, or a lofted six over long off or long on?
What about a batsman dancing down the wicket to do so. What about the poetry of a hook shot to a bouncer or the brute force of a pull shot that races to the ropes like lightning. Words fail me to say about the drama of run-outs, stumpings, quick-reflex catches in the slips and forward short-leg, dramatic stops at the boundary line; so on and so forth.
The quick running between wickets, the raised bat as a batsman reaches a milestone, a bowler’s elation at the sound of the cricket ball hitting the stumps; the running in of players to the centre to crowd around and celebrate; what fantastic entertainment is this!
Young friends, life is not just about existence. Instead it is about living life to the fullest. It is about utilizing your fullest potential not just to achieve fame or fortune but more to inspire others to do well. This is a great privilege and responsibility. You can inspire others by your great performances. As Helen Keller, who inspired many by her triumph over great odds in life, once wrote , “When we do the best we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life, or in the life of another.”
That is what exactly happened in the 1983 World Cup with Kapil Dev’s unbeaten 175 against Zimbabwe. It was nothing short of a miracle as when he came in to bat India were 17 for the loss of 5 wickets. Kapil recently said this about that great knock: “I was too young at that time to understand the emotions. Now after so many years, the achievement has finally sunk in and I realize it was a truly great one. God creates a day for sportspeople and that day was mine.”
Finally, cricket teaches us the art of finishing well. Often in the game we find teams starting off well while batting. When everything seems to be going great and commentators start projecting big final scores there is a sudden middle-order collapse which is soon followed by some bowler finishing off the tail.
Though not every match goes according to this script, it is vitally important to note that many teams fail to follow through the good work they do at the beginning of an innings. This can be due to overconfidence, concentration loss, allowing pressure of the situation to get the better of one’s nerves, carelessness or sometimes poor decision-making. Whatever it be, the team that wins is one that has one or two players who are great finishers.
Finishing well is definitely a great art. For example, during the golden days of West Indian Cricket, there was a kind of habit with the West Indian batsmen to finish off every game with a six. Likewise each one of us should determine early in life to finish well. Otherwise you’ll be rattled at the crossroads of life when life takes unexpected twists and turns. Sadly very few cricket players have ended the long innings of their career on a high note. Others waited to be dropped from the team before announcing retirement. But a few like Steve Waugh and Muttiah Muralitharan finished their test careers in blazing glory as if it were a fairy tale ending.
Let me sum up the main highlights once again:
Cricket is a beautiful game. It not only entertains but educates as well. Cricket teaches us that mistakes are common in life. It teaches us that each individual is unique and important even in a team and that success belongs to those who enjoy the game best. Further, cricket teaches us that life needs planning and preparation and shows us that perseverance is the key to leave a lasting legacy behind. Above all, cricket teaches us that life is about entertainment meaning that life is to be lived out to its fullest God-given potential so that you’ll inspire others with your performances. Beyond all this cricket teaches us the art of finishing well in life. To conclude, great cricket legends never die; they just fade away!
As many colours are there so also are there many lenses with which to view success. Each will show a different image; coloured by the way each person likes to see success:
Success!
It all starts with a desire to do something worthwhile. Most of us fail right here. Our focus is inward. Trying to receive; but reluctant to give. But blessed is the man who learns to give of his time, talent, treasure and knowledge to others.
Success!
It is one’s ability to stick to a purpose. You can call it constancy to purpose. The oft-quoted example is that of the postal stamp which sticks to the envelope and makes it to the destination.
Success!
It is one’s ability not to wait for seeds to sprout. You might have heard the historic legend of Johnny Appleseed, born John Chapman (September 26, 1774 – February 18, 1845), who went around planting apple seeds across many states in U.S.A. and kept on travelling doing good.
He did not wait for the seeds to sprout. But knew that someday the good that he had planted would multiply when the seeds would sprout and grow and bear fruit. The point I am trying to make is, “He who conducts an orchestra must turn his back to the crowd.”
Success!
Is all about the quest for excellence. Sometime ago I read somewhere that “Michael Angelo painted with a brush in one hand and a candle in the other to prevent his shadow from covering his masterpiece in progress.” Such quest for excellence should inspire us to do better.
Success! It’s all about keeping on moving while waiting. There is a saying by Thomas Alva Edison, “Everything comes to him who hustles while he waits.” What does it mean? To hustle here means to move energetically and rapidly. But how to do it while waiting? that’s the question!
It is with hopes and aspirations, dreams and ambitions that you are on this Campus this morning. You are raring to go.
Everything is new for you–new classrooms, new teachers, new friends and even new technology. But this Institution towers tall and has stood here like a spreading tree of knowledge for decades. So you have come to a place which has a rich tradition.
But we have not fossilized. We have embraced change every step of the way. As you look around you can see how modern the facilities here are. So welcome dear students to a time of zestful living and wonderful learning.
Let me now spell out for you two things you can hold dear as you are here:
One, keep sight of your goals. Life on campus is colourful. There are many activities you can be part of. And I do wish that each one of you will find your part in some of them. We do not want you to be just gathering information from here; but we want you to learn character, discipline, compassion, and above all understand the meaning of life.
But activities should not become distractions. You should never major on minor things. Always keep things in perspective. What is important should never be marginalized. Therefore keep your goals in front of you always. Each day measure the steps you have taken towards your goals. Then you will find success.
Two, love and patience should go hand in hand. Youth is a time when love blooms in spring, blushes, and often fades in the intense heat of summer or becomes frozen in winter’s biting cold. No one has yet found out why and how love begins. Some call it chemistry; others blame it on hormones; and still many to blind chance.
Whatever it be; years of teaching and personal touch with students have taught me one thing–many stories of love, jealousy, misunderstanding, fights, tears, and occasionally happy endings have been scripted here.
But there is one golden thread life-lesson I can share with you. Anything in the name of love that makes you hasty; compels you to yield to a mad rush of emotion; which makes you offer in the fires of pleasure what that is to be guarded with utmost sanctity and care; is not love.
Therefore be patient. Let time test your love. What has to remain will remain. And then when patience has run its course; you will find joy with great peace and lasting friendship accompanying.
Let me conclude. As the Principal of this college, I heartily welcome each one of you wishing you that you find the best time of your life during the course of study here. Never lose sight of your goals and let love be girded and guarded with patience. Life ahead can be exciting. Wish you all God’s best in your studies.
Joy is more than happiness. While a lot of good things make us happy; joy is not attached to things or achievements.
This is because joy is a God-given gift. It is an outflow of what God is. He is full of joy.
Well, that itself should surprise you with joy. More so, because he desires that you have joy in life; and not just happiness.
Joy can bring health to your internally. It can bring healing to you as much as medicines can.
Joy looks forward to long-term goals with hope instead of looking at present day difficulties and giving up in despair.
Joy is not limited. The best example is the angelic announcement to shepherds at the first Christmas. He said, “I bring you good news of great joy which will be for all the people.”1
Joy is easily lost if we allow the worries of life, wrong habits, and relationship problems to choke it in our hearts.
But joy can bubble forth and flow over when you are at peace with God, having your sins forgiven, and enjoying friendship with him.
Finally, joy is found in prayer. It is God’s promise. So just walk up to God, talk with him, unburden yourself, and carry back his joy with you.
Listen to the Risen Christ speak with authority: “I have placed before you an open door that no one can shut.” 1 These words have put courage in the hearts of countless men and women down through the centuries.
And today, if a closed door has left you feeling helpless and stranded, here are a few thoughts to think on:
Secondly, look up to God. He can create opportunities where none exists. What he shuts no one can open and what he opens for you, no one can shut. But looking up to God does not mean there are easy answers.
You might have a long wait ahead. And it is often this test of patience that wears you down. Nothing seems to happen while you wait. But that is how it is.
Thirdly, even while you pray to God, sharpen your skills. Learn something new that will help you make the leap when your opportunity comes. If you fail to update your knowledge you will never be able to make yourself prepared and ready for the new thing that will come to your life.
See, when God sent the rain and the flood, he asked Noah to build the ark. Neither had Noah seen rain before; nor had he ever built even a small boat. But he was ready when the flood came. Then the LORD shut him in inside the ark.2 The shut-in experience became a blessing; a place of safety, and an open door to a new beginning in life.
Fourthly, ask, seek, and knock. Look around you. A closed door can mean that you have to change directions. What might have been a success in the past might not be what is needed for the hour. Your willingness to change can be tested at this time. Keep looking for the next opportunity maybe in a new area or domain.
Finally, the most difficult one among all this, thank God for the closed door in your life: Thanking God means that you are admitting that the situation is beyond your wisdom to handle. Thanking God that you trust God to make the next move for you. Thanking God that you understand that God is preparing people and circumstances to match the moment that will make others look at you and say, “See, what God has done!”3
It is quite natural to be anxious about your children. Your children are God’s gift to you. So they are precious. And they are the future.
At their young age, it is as if God has entrusted you with the awesome responsibility to raise them up as God-fearing citizens. It is up to you that they look not for words of advice but for a model and an example which they can emulate and put to practice as well.
Here are a few tips that might prove useful.
#1. Celebrate the uniqueness of your child.
It is quite understandable that you want your child to excel and win the first rank if possible every time. At the same time, it is more important to realize that your child is very unique and different in his talent, temperament, attitudes and passion from even his or her brother or sister.
Therefore do not fall into the trap of comparing your child with anyone else. That is playing with fire. Remember, a dog is not a lion and a lion is not an eagle nor is an eagle a dolphin. Each has its own unique role to play.
So the first responsibility you have is to simply cherish your child as a unique person.
#2. Appreciate your child even for small things he or she does well.
Often we shout at our children; don’t we? Even though we know we should not vent our frustration or anger resulting from a bad day at our work on our children, we do that. And often we feel sorry later.
But the best thing you can do for your child is to praise him and appreciate him for any small thing he does well. The more you do it, genuinely, the more confident your child will become. He will have a greater sense of worth and dignity.
Children who lack appreciation at home and feel rejected seek acceptance somewhere else and in teenage years can land up in bad company quickly. Why? Simply because there he or she is accepted.
So shower you children with praise and appreciation at every opportunity you get.
#3. Spend time with your children.
It is a wrong thinking that your child is satisfied with the best electronic gadgets that you buy for him. Honestly, this is absolutely wrong. Buying the most expensive and trendy things for your child might advertise your money power; but it does not satisfy your child’s basic and most important need. That is quality time you spend with them.
Remember time flies. And before you know it, and because you were busy building your status in society and empires of your own, your child would have grown up into adulthood. And then it is useless to cry that you could spend much time with them in their young age.
Remember the greatest gift you can give your child is the quality time you spend with him or her.
#4. Listen to your children.
If you don’t listen to your children, even if what they talk is silly and even plain nonsense, the day will come when they will totally shut up. And then you will never know what they think, who their friends are, what are their difficulties at school or college or the mental pressures they undergo because of their studies or a wrong relationship.
God has given you two ears so that you will listen more than you talk. It is not bravado to tell your children that you are busy and yell at them to stop talking. Encourage them to speak. Let them open up. Give them the freedom to talk to you about matters that trouble their heart. In this way you show respect to them as well.
If you listen to your children today, tomorrow you will not to have to regret that they are not listening to you.
#5. Take time to understand your child’s passion, talent and ambition.
As parents, we like our children to fit into the society’s mould. So we pressurize them to become doctors when they want to be engineers, we compel them to do civil services when they want to be journalists and so on. Of course, there are times when the wisdom of parents should overrule the wrong choices children make.
But know that children excel in what they are passionate about. So as parents try to understand what their skill sets are. Help them to have good hobbies which are creative, involves physical activity and involves teaming up with others if possible.
This is far better than giving them a tablet or laptop or expensive mobile and allowing them to chat or play video games on it for hours. And it is often equally dangerous to try to make children do what we were good at or try to realize our unfulfilled dreams through them (there are occasions when it works but mostly it is not worth the try).
I have often quarreled with parents because they often label their children negatively in front of others. One of their favourite labels is this: “Oh, my child is an introvert.” This is shocking because most of the time this has nothing to do with reality.
Maybe the child is a bit shy. So what? Given the right environment like a change of school or given more time to play team games with friends, he or she will come up fantastically well. The more parents repeat this kind of negative labelling in front of others the child starts believing a lie about himself. The child goes on to become an introvert.
Never label your children. Put a guard over your mouth so that you resist the temptation to label your child negatively especially in front of others.
#7. Never forget to pray for your children daily.
So many children who went to wayward living during their teenage years have come back to their parents and to the forgiving love of God because of the prayers of their parents–especially the heartfelt, tearful, prayers of their mothers!
When your children go to school or college commit them and especially that day into God’s care. Pray that they will be given wisdom and discernment to face life’s challenges and also study well. Pray that they will not be drawn to evil things, and bad company; for the Bible warns, “”Bad company corrupts good character.”1
Knowing that parents are praying for them is a great encouragement for children and a surety of your love and care for them.
“See that you do not look down on one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven” – Jesus Christ.
What about bettering ourselves and scoring a perfect ten! What about having a winsome personality that attracts others with its magnetism, charm and grace! It takes a lot of persistent effort to do so; yet the message is you can!
#1. Smile
Smile is so universal; yet so many smiles are efforts to sell, deceive or manipulate. But if you can smile from your heart; and let joy radiate all over you lighting up the eyes with a twinkle and spreading cheer; then that smile reaches across boundaries. Isn’t a lovely smile on your face the key not only to personal attractiveness (more than all the cosmetics of this world); but also the key to build instant rapport with your audiences and win a place in the heart of all? Yes; a radiant smile is the key to lasting relationships.
#2. Courtesy
We live in an aggressive world where might is often confused with right. In the mad rush to be first we tend to bulldoze people into submission. But if we can practice little courtesies of life-those small acts of kindness and thoughtfulness-then we would make this earth a better place to live in. Life would be much more of glide than a bumpy ride then; for courteous behaviour (like helping an elder person do a simple task which he finds difficult to do) is like oil that lubricates the hinges of a door. Can you not with a little thoughtfulness practice showing respect and care to all who cross your way? I think you can!
#3. Kind Words Words are like a knife’s edge when used with malice. It makes others bleed. Words that are potentially loaded with harm are like vicious dogs waiting to be let loose to tear their innocent victims apart. Isn’t it better to post a doorkeeper at the gate of your mouth rather than spit venom like cobras? This was King David’s prayer to God, “Set a guard over my mouth, O LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips” (Psalm 141:3). No doubt, we need God’s grace to keep our mouths shut! At the same time we need to practice the art of speaking kind words that will win friends and influence people.
#4. Don’t Pry into Other People’s Private Lives
There is a private space for everyone which no one wants to have violated. Even the hot selling point of more leg space available with cars and airliners is an indication of its emotional counterpart. While this need of being alone with one’s thoughts and emotions is there; I’ve met many people whose sole objective in life is to ask nasty or cleverly masked questions with the intent to pry open very personal and private information. (What is surprising is that these questioners are very secretive themselves who resist being asked questions!) Isn’t it much better to allow people their private space and maintain their respect towards you than be marked out as a sour person because of your prying nature?
#5. Keep Commitments
Have you ever tried to say this over phone: “I’m in a meeting now. Will call you later”? Later, did you forget all about your promise? When such forgetfulness happens many times, people will not consider you reliable. You will lose their trust and your credibility. Therefore make sure that you follow through with your promises and deliver. One real cause of friction in relationships occurs when people do not stick to time of meeting agreed upon. Why not be a winning personality by being on time every time?
#6. Be Skilled in Something Other Than Your Work
Came across an interesting proverb recently which says, “God does not subtract from men’s lives the time spent for fishing.” Are you hooked to some constructive hobby or leisure time activity? Are you extremely good at it? Not only does it help you to enjoy life to the fullest but it also gives you something attractive to talk about when you meet with people. Help people remember you by your passion and your excellence in that pursuit.
#7. Do Not Sound Your Own Trumpet
It is sad when there is no one to say words of praise for you. But it is pitiable when you try to praise your own achievements yourself. It is comical to see people who blare their own horns at the first chance they get to speak. So avoid this habit yourself. On the other hand, one good thing you can do is to show interest in what others consider important for themselves. For some it might be their children, for others their work or even their love of some sport. When you show interest and are willing to listen; not only will they feel honoured but you will also gain valuable insights on what is close to people’s hearts.
#8. Allow People to Save Face
How often we jump in to condemn a person who made a mistake? How sad to see people pounce on one who has offered a sincere apology already for the wrong committed? More insulting are generalized and caustic statements like, “He is always like this doing stupid things.” Allow people to save face. When you act graciously with people who make mistakes they will be motivated to reward your kindness with better and responsible behaviour from their part.
#9. Do Not Be a Quitter
Life and success is all about perseverance. But losing is a habit with many not because they can’t win; but because they have struck a romance with giving up. It all starts in small matters like not completing a speech or leaving one corner of the room uncleaned. Such small things snowball into a mountain which stands as a real barrier to your life’s progress. So make it a habit of completing the small tasks of life and big things will take care of themselves. After all, the great lesson of life is that you have to determine to finish strong!
#10. Show Confidence and Initiative
People love to be led. You might also be someone who loves to follow. But strangely there are always people who look up to you. The question is whether you are someone who can take the lead with confidence in getting something done. Though we all face loss of confidence from time to time in life that prevents us from taking initiative, there are ways to get out loss of confidence. Never forget that one good initiative you take can catch up with others like how Benjamin Franklin lighted up the entire city of Philadelphia by taking the initiative to hang a lighted lamp in front of his home at night.
Like pebbles from rough stones come after many a tumble in the stream beds; so also a lovely personality is shaped after much chiselling in the grind of life. Are you game for it?
Perhaps you might not succeed in delivering a great speech this time also! So what? Understand that a speaker is not a once-for-all finished product. Instead the beauty of a speaker is that he or she is being moulded every day. Instead of trying to destroy the flaws; try to blend them into the design.
That means work on your strength as a speaker and being very good at it. Then slowly you’ll find that the shortcomings do not trouble the outcome of the speech. After all, all good speeches are based on lessons learned from plenty of bad speeches. When these lessons are stringed together; it shapes a speech that touches the heart, rouses the intellect, and inspires people.
Nothing Can Substitute You
Some find it painful at first to accept their shortcomings. Yet it is a joyful release of hope and celebration as one finds the truth that he or she is so unique and that nobody can replace him or her no matter what others think of them.
Yes friend, their might be so many things not perfect about you. Yet there is nobody else like you. So celebrate life as God’s gift to you. What better return can you give for that gift than being true to your own self.
So let us stop pretending. We are not actors on a world stage. Instead we are real people with ever so many shortcomings. Each one of us is having infinite value and worth in God’s eyes even though we appear to be of so little worth to others. That is the truth.
And there comes a moment when that truth dawns. This experience is liberating to say the least as far as a speaker is concerned. For the greatest asset a speaker brings on stage is he or she himself. No other visual aid can ever substitute you on stage.
You need not try to be extravagant in your dressing to make a statement. What comes across to the audience much more powerfully is the quiet confidence that you bring onto stage born out of the knowledge that you are making a statement as no one else can!
The Secret Is to Fall in Love
When a man and woman fall in love, the desire to communicate with each other dominates their thoughts. This is the key to being a great speaker.
When the desire to communicate is fuelled by a relevant message you are able to connect with your audience. At this point, your focus is not on fear about speaking; but on how to make yourself understood to the audience.
That brings us to falling in love once again. The moment that happens you want to express your love. It can take the form of gifts,flowers, cards or chocolates. All that means just one thing: “I love you.” That is the big idea, the key thought, and the overriding emotion.
But the fun is that you are thinking about yourself. All your thoughts are on your loved one. This is what should dominate a speaker’s mind–to make the audience understand what he has got to communicate. That is the desire to communicate. When that happens it is goodbye to stage fright and extraordinary delight in speaking!
Starting Trouble
“The human brain is a wonderful organ. It starts to work as soon as you are born and doesn’t stop until you get up to deliver a speech.” When the brain freezes, a beginner-speaker can panic at this point. However hard he tries, he might not get anything to speak on.
But what is the real problem that haunts a person when he tries to find a topic? Is it really that he does not have enough knowledge about something the problem? I don’t think so. The problem is something different. It is a nagging feel of the mind that tells the speaker that what he speaks about might be uninteresting to the audience.
This thought is simply untrue. Anything about you can be made interesting. Your biographical sketch can be interesting; provided it does not boast about “I did this,” and “I did that,” and provided that it does not go for a chronological listing of academic achievements. Instead if you briefly mention some aspect of your academic side that the audience can listen to with delight, then you would succeed.
Likewise, your favourite hobby, ambition, likes and dislikes, relationships, the game you love,movies that you like, are all subjects that can be made into interesting speeches. So next time someone invites you to speak, do not think of complex subjects and panic. Instead think on simple things and speak. For simplicity always appeals. It hides greatness within!
You need not try to take a detailed account of every mistake you make while you speak. Instead take some time to recollect some portion of your speech you had done well. And think of how to excel that performance.
For it is in pushing beyond your best past performances and rising above your limitations that true test of character is found. Such efforts involve most certainly the possibility of failure and more surely the ridicule of lesser mortals.
Your opportunity is now. It is yours when the wind is against you and strongest; and the night at its darkest. With trust in God and with commitment to finish strong, it is surely time to wake up from despair and make your speech and life count.
Organizing Content
If you organize your speech well, then it is easy for the audience to pick out the information you offer. You make listening easy by dividing your content into manageable packets. There are many popular methods to do so. Categorical and chronological arrangements are two such.
Many more ways of organizing content of your speech can be thought of. But the important thing to remember is that you need to cut the big cake to small pieces. And then offer them to your listeners so that they can have one piece at a time.
I Remember It Like Yesterday
The rule of thumb is to describe less but suggest more when you narrate your experiences. Then the audience will listen keenly to your speech and be more involved in it than otherwise. Memories do make speeches colourful.
Yet many of us forget to build a memory bank. Let not your hurts, nor your failures, nor your doubts, nor betrayals that you faced in life take away from you the zest for living. Yes, full participation in life; in its good, gives you great memories.
Then your speech will be spiced with them. And you’ll have an appreciative audience every time you speak.
Olympics is one of the finest expressions of man’s passion to excel, dominate and win. On the other side, the agony and the pain of defeat after having come so close is the stuff that the legend of the Olympics is made of. In this speech today, I would like to highlight perseverance as the key to the Olympic glory.
Failing is one thing; but failing without a true fight is something else. Do we lose the battle even before the game begins? Are victories made in the playing arena or is it worked out in one’s mind already? These are questions worthy of our highest consideration.
Under-achievers try desperately to find short cuts to avoid preparing for performance. But honest hard work is the only way in which preparation can be done. If you can do the unglamorous work of preparation in the shadows; then when the spotlights will focus on you, they’ll see the emergence of a champion like gold coming out purified in the fire!
Dear friends, there is no substitute, I say again, no substitute for “blood, toil, tears and sweat.” The Olympic glory is not a product of rocking away in easy chairs; but is the reward of those whose “faces are marred by dust and sweat and blood,” today.
So many have said this many times, but I am saying it again: “Rome was not built in a day.” Everybody says it feels great to win an Olympic gold. But how long have you to be at it to win? How many heartaches have you to endure?
With what courage will you bounce back from defeats? Will your enthusiasm hold good when all that you built up over the years crumble down into rubble and dust?
Keeping on going for medal gold even when you’re crushed in spirit, even when medal gold seems unattainable, even when detractors say that it is not possible to achieve, is the secret of winning! In one word, perseverance is the key!
Victories in life are not permanent. We find the Olympics throw up new champions every four years. We find the glory of the past achievers pale into insignificance with the arrival of new ones.
So what is the relevance of the Olympic glory? It should teach you and me that life’s most coveted moments might not perhaps be in the victory stands. The lasting legacy might not be the medal you won but the sterling example you leave behind of “how you played the game!”
Dear friends, the Olympic glory is not for the man who is chasing a few nice rabbits here and there when he is hunting a prized lion. He has to keep track of his one goal. He has to keep his eyes focussed. He should see nothing but his victory. He should be able to say No to passions of life and distractions that all others indulge in.
Life continues. The Olympic torch in its journey across oceans and continents represents this continuity. It tells us that a message is being passed on. of a positive message of excellence to the next generation.
Will the next generation remember you as one who fought well; no matter whether you won or lost? Let me conclude in the words of Napoleon Bonaparte, “Victory belongs to the most persevering!”
It doesn’t take much to build a good habit. If you can aim for five minutes each day it can be done. Brushing one’s teeth is a simple example of the power of habit. We were taught to do it when we were young. The fact that we continue to do it is because of the habit formation that happened in our childhood.
Let me suggest a few habits you can try out each morning for five minutes. We will start with a spiritual habit. Most of us don’t realize that several people across the globe don’t wake up each morning. So be thankful to God for giving you grace to see a new day.
Take five minutes just to praise him, just like the birds do at dawn. Thank him for goodness shown to you. Do not bring in your needs or requests or complaints at this time.
Another habit you can think about us to read something inspirational for five minutes each day. Or you can choose to listen to an inspirational talk. Why is this important? It is important because we all need reminders. We often forget fundamentals. Reading or listening can remind us of basics.
For example, reading from the Book of Proverbs in the Bible can remind you, “All hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty.”* We have seen a spiritual habit and a habit for engaging your mind.
Now let us look at play. Look around you. What is the sight that you see everywhere. Isn’t it that of the young and old with heads bowed down? Are they praying? No, not at all. It is sad that physical activity has now come down because people find entertainment in mobiles. Nature of work for many also encourage sitting down for long hours.
So make it a point to spend five minutes doing physical exercise. It can not only ensure physical wellness but also contribute to emotional well-being.
Finally, let me conclude with a social habit. Greet people with a smile. If done from your heart it can spread happiness. What better time to do it than when you see a person first thing in the morning? To conclude, let me say that five minutes a day can change the way you dress up for success. Good habits formed can help you win in life like no other.
Long distance runners or swimmers probably find the laps immediately after the half-way mark most difficult. That is the time when motivation starts running low and discouragement sets in.
Of course there are individual variations but anyone who has attempted a big project knows all about the pressure that builds on the mind towards the middle.
#1. When your energy is running low do not think of the finishing tape. Think of what you are doing at the present. Just focus on completing that one step. In other words do it one step at a time.
#2. Recollect your motive. What was it that made you attempt this in the first place? When you think of it; your motivation, if it is a genuine one, will come back. Find some way to keep reminding yourself of your mission statement.
#3. Remind yourself that great victories are won by simply holding on when the cause seems hopeless. Do not listen to your emotions which are playing tricks on your mind at the moment. So stay on course no matter how low you feel.
#4. Try to stand in the shoes of a Coach. Imagine you telling somebody in your current situation words of motivation. What will you say? Definitely you won’t ask that person to quit; will you? So the positive words you would imagine telling another will itself pump you up with enthusiasm.
#5. Seek help. There is no need to act brave when you are feeling down. Talk with someone you trust and ventilate your thoughts. Make sure that the person you are talking to is someone who is able to help you see reality in a proper light. After listening to you, he or she will be able to tell you exactly why situations are not as bad as it seems to be.
#7. Make prayer a habit. Those who suddenly think about calling to God for help would possibly find that they don’t have his phone number. But those who are familiar with God by spending time with him daily will find it much easier to tell God how tempted they are to quit. When such an honest prayer is made, God often sends his angels to strengthen you; and often these angels are people whom you least expected to be there for you at that critical hour.
Everyone seems to be angry these days. Outbursts of anger have become common.
#1. The Pressure Cooker
Some people bottle up things on the inside and keep it boiling under tremendous pressure. At some weak point the whole pressure comes out with a loud blowing whistle. It jolts listeners and makes them wonder what really happened to provoke such an outburst.
The solution is simple. Have an outlet. Find a trusted friend with whom you can share on a regular basis what is irritating you. That is a safety valve.
“Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control ” – Proverbs 25:28.
#2. Accept Others
One of the surest ways to have conflict in marriage is when one tries to change the other. This simply does not work. Therefore the husband gets angry at the wife and vice versa.
The surest way such conflicts can be avoided is to understand and accept your husband/wife as a person with shortcomings. And love him/her anyway in spite of all faults.
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails” – St. Paul (1 Corinthians 13:4–8).
#3. Self-Righteousness
Many people get angry because they think that they are right all the time; and whatever others say is wrong. It is ego at its worst. When combined with pride it becomes destructive.
If you honestly admit, you’ll be able to say that a major percentage of outburst of anger from your part happened because you had the “I am right” attitude.
Why not think there are other people who could be right. And be humble enough to admit the fact that you might not know everything under the sun.
“Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools.” — (Ecclesiastes 7:9).
#4. Don’t React Quickly
Sometimes there is a genuine reason why you became angry. But it is good to give yourself time to think. Take a walk and get alone for some time. Do not allow your emotions to do the talking. Think through the problem. And speak (or write) to those concerned after you calm down.
Such a time gap would clarify issues and you’ll be able to deal with the core issue rather than lose yourself in lesser and unimportant issues that can take the power out of your communication.
“Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.” .” — (James 1:19, 20)
Summing Up
Anger without doubt ruptures relationships. It wounds deeply. Words spoken in anger cannot be taken back. They get struck deep in the hearts of those it wounds.
Is there a remedy? Ask God for help. It might sound too simplistic. But it is always wise to seek his help. For anger, even when one is aware of it as a problem, is not easily overcome.
Anger can have deep roots in a sense of failure in life. It can be caused because you carry bitterness in your heart because somebody wronged you or abused you physically or emotionally.
Anger can come when you feel helpless due to physical weakness or financial lack or shortage. Anger can arise in our hearts when people judge you unjustly, raise false accusations against you and say unkind words of criticism.
Anger can also come when people attribute wrong motives to your good intentions and when they fail to respect you. Let me ask again, is there a remedy?
There might be lots of advice you can find. Common sense, practical advice from friends, counselling; all might help. But these might not address the root cause or causes of the problem.
Personally, I would strongly ask you to seek God’s help in prayer. Cry out to him. Ask him for forgiveness. Seek his help to heal all wounds and hurts and pain caused by your outbursts of anger. Yes, my friend, seek God. You will find mercy with him to help you come out of anger healed!
—
“Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret–it leads only to evil.” — Psalm 37:8
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. — Ephesians 4:26, 27.
“An angry man stirs up dissension, and a hot-tempered one commits many sins.”– Proverbs 29:22
“Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn his ways and get yourself snared.” — Proverbs 22:24, 25. [All quotes above from Bible NIV 1984 edition]
A statue of beauty and marvel is born when the marble allows the chisel to chip away its edges; hidden potential is never brought out without the pain of edges being shaved off sharply.
Prayer works best only when you are ready to change and accept the answer that God in his wisdom delays; he never answers unless you are desperate enough to grab the new and leave old ways behind.
Therefore grow old in years but retain that wonder which provoked the child in you to ask and keep on asking; for when you lose that wonder all is old and nothing new.
—
Inspired by the words of the Bible, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” (2 Corinthians 5:17)
The first thing to do to speak without fear is your willingness to try. Forget about all the lies about your failure the devil whispers in your mind. Instead, be ready to make a fool of yourself on stage.
Let me tell you the truth point blank:
One, you will make mistakes; I don’t know anyone who does not make them on stage; at least once in a while. I know I do.
Two, people will say good things to you like, “You speech was wonderful.” The best thing to do is not to believe it. For it doesn’t mean anything. And probably they have no more knowledge of the craft of speech than you do.
Three, people have too many things to think about already–the bills they have to pay, how to manage their bad boss at office, and the studies of their children that worry them. Do you think they have time to think about your speech and all its faults? I doubt.
Of course, you will feel humiliated when you make mistakes. For we are made of flesh and blood and emotions and mood swings; aren’t we? So, what’s the big deal? Your failure on stage proved you to be a human being. That’s all to it; and nothing more.
Now how to handle criticism levelled against you. It definitely hurts. Why? Because we have strong egos. Now what does than mean? It is the thinking that I am right (always), and I simply can’t be wrong.
Now think about it this way. It doesn’t matter how good or bad your speech was. Think about improving on it. Be dissatisfied with your best efforts. Then you will be able to see criticism helping you on the road to excellence than tearing you apart.
Finally, let me tell you the secret of success I have personally known and experienced in speaking. To me, it has always been the truth of God’s love to me displayed on the Cross of Calvary where Jesus shed his blood and died.
It has also taught me that failures are integral to the process of becoming good. It teaches you more about humility than anything else.
So face your fears honestly. But don’t make it an excuse to run away from speaking situations. Volunteer to speak. Fail. Fail again and again. The time will come when it will be difficult for you to not to succeed. And still if you fail, let it be so. But tomorrow you will try again; won’t you!
I am yet to meet a genuinely talented person who has not passed through a period of loss of confidence in his or her life or career. Certainly these dark periods of doubt have really made people stronger than before.
When you pass through a period of loss of confidence it is quite natural to brood on all negatives and failures that has happened to you. That is self-defeating. Instead of doing this, think of all your best past performances and believe that you can do it again.
Some people accept loss of confidence as a permanent attachment of their lives! How sad to see people live in the belief that they will never get out of loss of confidence. Such a belief is a lie and totally untrue!
What we need to accept is the fact that for a brief passing period of life we have entered a tunnel experience where all is dark. But hold on. Light will break at the end of the tunnel. Loss of confidence therefore should be accepted as a normal part of life but never accepted as a permanent condition. In this acceptance you will find freedom!
At the same time resist the huge temptation to rush things and the attempt to get back to top gear as quickly as possible. But if you attempt to rush things, that attempt is surely going to backfire on you
Instead take your time. Go it slow. Stop your activity and simply do nothing for long periods. Your mind and body need the stops rather than the notes of music at this time. And remember each person in the same situation of loss of confidence takes a different time to recoup and recover. So take your time and do not allow anyone to rush you!
Your goal at the moment is to get back the rhythm and the passion and the enthusiasm and the effortless grace with which you did things in the past. Till you get back to your absolute best, stay contented on the small stage. Your time to roar and soar is just a few days away!
No matter what the darkness in your life; no matter how great the loss you have faced; no matter whether it was your irresponsibility or mistake; no matter how long you have been out of touch with your best; no matter who or what great odds are pitted against you; no matter how depressed and sorrowful you are now; know that with God nothing is impossible.
As King David rightly expressed,: “You, O LORD, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light” (Psalm 18:28). Yes, with God you can. Even before you stop reading this, thank God for the mighty comeback he has enabled in your life. It will happen; it surely will!
A final thought that we need to keep in mind is that loss of confidence is no hopeless condition.
If rightly approached, such a phase in life can bring the best out of us; and can result in an outflow of creative use of our hidden potential and talents. More perhaps has been achieved by people with loss of confidence when they have trusted in the grace of God.
When St. Paul prayed thrice that God would remove a thorn in his flesh (exactly what this source of his loss of confidence was no one knows), the Lord Jesus Christ told him the secret to get the better of it:
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weaknesses.”
Paul, powered by that word of confidence, became a great achiever in spite of all negatives that happened to him in life. So also we too can achieve trusting in the power of the One whose grace is sufficient in all our loss of confidence and whose power energizes us to rise and conquer in spite of all our weaknesses!
Therefore with St. Paul, let us also confidently say, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13 Bible NKJV).
Great dreams are deposited in human hearts by divine hands. Then an ordinary man becomes a dreamer. He starts thinking beyond his time and circumstances. It is soon followed by the dreamer being shaped by his dream.
Dream Big
Dreaming big has many impacts. First of all it changes you from within. It enlarges your heart to think of possibilities. It gives you an increased measure of faith to trust in God. It gives you a sense of destiny. When these kind of things happen you feel a stirring within you to fly high above your circumstances that might be trying to pull you down.
When dreams are lived out it is quite natural to encounter rough weather. It can come in the form of mistakes,unkind criticism, threats, failures, thoughts of giving up, and finally loss in many forms including finance and reputation. But bad times enlarge one’s heart, strengthen one’s resolve, fuel the passion to achieve and steel one’s character with integrity.
Go On. Finish Strong.
The temptation to give up midway into the success story is common to man. It all happens when one loses sight of the finishing tape. Then the focus gets blurred. Other distractions too can easily side-track at this point in time.
Plan Your Innings
It is a great surprise to me to see how many people go through life without any serious planning. All they do is crisis management. Instead if they could have a game plan and stick to it they can have success. Be flexible to change according to what the situation demands without totally destroying the original game plan.
Wisdom to Run Your Business
A lamp cannot burn if there is no supply of oil to it. Likewise a man cannot continue to shed light if his wisdom runs out of supply. He, in order to successfully run an enterprise, needs a continual supply of wisdom. It is needed not only to plan but also to make right decisions. “If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously without finding fault, and it will be given to him” (James 1:5 Bible).
Time cannot be bought nor can it be saved. Yet we often procrastinate and allow the doors of opportunity to close. Therefore “Never leave till tomorrow which you can do today” as Benjamin Franklin so wisely observed.
Celebrate What Is That Is Uniquely Yours
Others are usually good at pointing out what you are not good at. But it might take a long time for them or for you yourself to know the worth of the treasure that you carry in your earthen vessel.
But realize that each one of us has a gift of his own. And it is in the exploring, developing, and maturing of that gift to fruitfulness that a person becomes useful to others. Therefore fan into flame the gift of God that is in you.
Failures Do Not Mean the Game Is Over
Perhaps we need to learn to fail successfully:
Of course its primary lesson is sportsman spirit. One has to learn to treat failures with the same courtesy with which one treats successes.
The second lesson of course is to know that failures happen once in a while to the best of men. But we will never lower our standards. And never stop striving to win.
Purpose Is Important
Purpose gives direction to life. It helps you to focus on priorities and not get entangled by the niceties of life. A purpose-driven life is not easily distracted. Instead such a life is relentlessly focussed on achieving the goals and objectives which it had set out to accomplish and finish.
Growth: You Cannot Afford to Stay Still!
Growth in life is a complex process. But its principle is simple. It can be said in two words, “Let go!” And there is much value in those two simple words. Real growth in life comes only when we learn to leave self-defeating habits and negative thinking patterns behind.
“Do you see a man skilled in his work? He will serve before kings; he will not serve before obscure men” (Proverbs 22:29).
Focus
Focus, I believe, is a key element in any success story. Being sure of what you want to do in life and why! When you are focused you will eliminate all good things that are distractions. In modern contexts, gadgets and social media can take your focus away quite easily.
Empty Spaces
Empty spaces can come in the pursuit of any dream. See those blank spaces through the eyes of music which too has empty spaces. “The notes I handle no better than many pianists. But the pauses between the notes — ah, that is where the art resides” so said the noted Austrian classical pianist Artur Schnabel.
Looking at Closed Doors
I have learned from experience that God is in the business of opening and closing doors: “What he opens no one can shut, and what he shuts no one can open . . . See, I have placed before you an open door that no one can shut (Revelation 3:7b, 8)” is what he has said. Therefore looking ahead with hope and trust in God when doors close is part of a dreamer’s attitude to achieve success.
Loss of Confidence can strike after a series of defeats. It can make you think that you are not worth it and that all your efforts were in vain. It can drain away initiative from you. But surprisingly loss of confidence can happen at the best moments too though I have never discovered why it happens. That is a whole lot more difficult to handle.
Often a smile, an encouraging comment, a positive feedback or an unexpected phone call are those little things that has put confidence in me back again in such situations. If you are able to have one good laugh it can easily restore confidence.
This is the simple and most enduring lesson I have learned: Keep on doing what you are good at in spite of all doubts, despair, discouragement, disillusionment and defeats. And bounce back from most astonishing setbacks.
Leave a Legacy Behind
You leave a legacy behind when you have been able to show someone the stairway they had to climb in life. You leave a legacy behind when you have been a small match lighting up great torches. You leave a legacy behind when you have been able to make a person smile.
The Bible in the words of the Prophet Daniel promises a rich star-studded legacy to those who have tried to live like that: “Those who are wise will shine like the brightness of the heavens, and those who lead many to righteousness, like the stars for ever and ever (Daniel 12:3)!”
Short Speeches of Introduction, Welcome, Felicitation, Vote of Thanks!“The journey has by no means ended. But when one hits a century it is always an emotional moment. Yet it is also a time to look back and find out what elements had contributed to the success story.”
The above post is a condensation of Century Notes published on the occasion of the Century Batch of Bejoy Peter’s Public Speaking. In the preface I had written then:
“The journey has by no means ended. But when one hits a century it is always an emotional moment. Yet it is also a time to look back and find out what elements had contributed to the success story.”
The 100th Batch of Bejoy Peter’s Public Speaking was held at the Trivandrum YMCA from 2nd July to 14th July, 2007 with 16 students in attendance.
There are three things you should remember once you have tasted success:
The first thing to remember to counter complacency is that others are working hard to reach where you reached. You simply cannot relax.
Do not think that competition disappears when you have succeeded. The truth is it becomes more competitive than ever. So to stay at the top you need to exercise more vigilance than what it took to take you to the top in the first place.
Remember, when success weds complacency, it spells failure!
The second thing to remember to counter complacency is that you need to be ready to embrace change and adapt new methods. Times and methodologies and technologies are changing rapidly.
What was cutting edge yesterday is blunt tomorrow. Therefore be alert to changing needs and stay ahead by initiating change than following it.
Remember, when success weds complacency, it spells failure!
Why do I stress this point? It is because great men and women, great teams and organizations, nations and empires fell because they compromised on the basics.
Remember, when success weds complacency, it spells failure!
So let me remind you once again. the three points you should remember to counter complacency: One, Others are on the move to reach where you are, probably inspired by your own performance. Two, you need to be flexible and willing to change methodologies as needed. Three, and more importantly remind yourselves of basics all the time.
Let me end by reminding you yet another time: When success weds complacency, it spells failure!
Every achievement in life springs from a burning desire to succeed. It is this burning desire that helps you conquer fear and break out from inhibitions.
Another word for burning desire is passion. What can I compare passion to? It is like a forest fire. It rages wild and burns down everything in its path. Therefore try to fuel passion in life.
Now let me ask you, “Have you met someone with a real burning desire and passion in life?” One thing you cannot miss about such a person is his or her single-minded aim.
He or she is someone who has given up on lesser ambitions and focused sharply on getting one thing done in life. Such a person is a disciplined person who has chiseled away everything else in life that will not contribute to that one aim that has taken hold of his or her heart so powerfully.
Yet another important mark of a passionate person is the ability to utilize time wisely. He will make use of opportunities that come his way. A passionate man knows that time is a resource that is constantly running out and can never be replenished. So he will plan and prioritize and act accordingly.
For his farewell Michael Schumacher wore his traditional Schuberth red helmet showing a single thank you message for his fans. “Life is about passions – Thank you for sharing mine” is written on the sides.
Yes, those who live life to the fullest are those who have a burning desire to succeed. Now the question is, “Do you have such a passion?”
If you have not failed, that means probably you succeeded in everything you did or you did not attempt to do anything at all.
The chances are that you never tried. Now why is that so? Most likely you were afraid to try because you feared to make mistakes. But then you already made the big mistake of not attempting.
What is the fear that keeps you from not trying. Isn’t it the fear of failure? Yes, it is!
What happens when you fail? The best thing that happens is that it shows you the stuff you are made of. Failures inspire you to do better next time, helps you learn from your mistakes and makes you desperate about winning. Failures can unmask your pretensions and show you your true character.
Failures also teach you humility. It teaches you that success is a process and not a destination. So there is no reality in classifying certain experiences of life as failures. What you probably call “failure” has done more to mould you into a person with strength of character than anything you achieved and termed as “success.”
So if you ask me, I prefer you to go and risk failure in something that you know to be good. The world may laugh at you. Let it do so.
But you go multiply your attempts. And when the nets come in empty after a long night’s hard work I hope and pray you will hear the voice of God saying“Put out into deep water, and let down the nets for a catch!”*
